I attended the event of "Karaoke Night" a few days ago, consumed over a gallon of beer, and alarmed bar patrons with an atonal rendition of Nine Inch Nails's "Closer." I basically just yelled "I want to FUCK YOU LIKE AN ANIMAL" a lot, in a sincere, lust-choked voice. I similarly tried to "sing" "Enjoy the Silence" by Depeche Mode but realized that I don't even really know how the song goes all that well!
I guess I just don't get singing. It seems like if you hear a simple melody in your head, you should be automatically able to reproduce it vocally the same way you can move limbs and stuff, but apparently not.
The others were all competent singers. The drunker I got, the more I found myself profoundly moved by every single song, even by the guy who kept performing alternative music from the late 90's. Everyone at the bar, except for an annoying gaggle of girls, sang every song with intensity and complete seriousness. The stupidity or, alternately, calculated obliqueness, of the lyrics only heightened the underlying emotion. A giant of a man named "Big Mike" belted out Oasis songs at a more-or-less uniform pitch and (shocking) volume. I was truly "lost in the music." Probably this is what people are supposed to experience at shows and concerts.
The next day was a hangover and the knowledge that I could not sing, that there can be no music inside of me. This cast a surprising pall over everything. I even recorded myself singing "Closer," mixing my ghoulish "vocals" with an mp3 of the actual song. Maybe I can improve! Then I went to cafe and drew a man with a large lower lip until 5 in the morning.